Former anime director Shinbou Akiyuki addresses the media.
KYOTO — After the eighth episode of
Girls und Panzer aired
late Monday, anime studios around Japan have collectively announced the
end of the anime industry and discontinued operation. “I would like to
thank the fans throughout the years for their continued support,”
Shinbou Akiyuki said as he addressed a crowd of reporters at SHAFT
headquarters. “But after the last episode of
Girls und Panzer, we all know that there is nothing more to accomplish in anime.”
At press time, countless staff could be seen walking out of animation
studios, and recycling bins were overflowing with storyboards and
sketch art.
“I don’t think this is actually news to anyone, but I would like to announce that
Kizumonogatari has been postponed indefinitely,” added Shinbou.
Representatives at Tokyo MX and TV Tokyo announced that every single
anime studio has pulled out of their previously reserved time slots. The
networks plan to air re-runs of TV dramas and infomercials.
“It was the perfect episode,” anime fan Kazumoto Junichi muttered as
he tossed his sizable collection of anime figurines and merchandise into
the garbage. “Just when you thought that this show couldn’t get any
better… damn.”
The episode featured the team of protagonists engaging a Russian
tankery school in the snow. Around midway through the episode, to utter
disbelief of the television audience, the Russian team burst into a
rendition of the traditional Russian war anthem “Katyusha”. Voice
actresses Kanemoto Hisako (Squid Girl, Cure Peace) and Uesaka Sumire
(Sanae Dekomori) performed the duet. The episode concluded with a
dramatic fight scene and ended on a cliffhanger after the Oorai High
School team were surrounded by the enemy.
The anime has been repeatedly lauded by critics for its surprising
immersion, fun plot, and unexpectedly disciplined pacing. Despite its
silly premise, it has remained mostly focused on the action of tank
battles, with keen attention to detail and solid animation.
During
the greatest insert song of all time, everyone involved in the anime
industry in any way realized that nothing better could possibly be
accomplished.
“The staff at [Production] I.G. do not feel it is necessary to
continue making anime,” stated director Shiotani Naoyoshi as he
officially announced that
Psycho-pass has been canceled. “Anime
as an art form has accomplished everything it needs to.” The subdued
press conference was briefly interrupted when Shiotani’s mobile phone
rang. He allowed his ringtone, an audio rip of the anime’s performance
of Katyusha, to play for several seconds before answering. Fellow
Production I.G. director Nomura Kazuya was visibly relieved after
revealing that
Robotics;Notes will stop airing immediately. “Now I can follow my father’s direction and become a fisherman,” Kazuya remarked to press.
Staff at Kyoto Animation headquarters could be seen throwing penciled frames of
Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai!
out the window as the Kyoto Metropolitan Sanitation Department
struggled to keep up with the massive volume of manga and anime goods
being thrown away. “My dream of animation guiding the children of today
towards a bright future has come true,” remarked legendary director
Miyazaki Hayao as he casually tossed his Academy Award for
Spirited Away into a garbage compactor.
As of Monday night, MyAnimeList.net ranks 3,517 anime higher than
Girls und Panzer.
Source : kevo.dasaku.net
